Abby is five. Abby has never been behind the wheel of a car (I realize that this should be a given, but these days, you just never know). Yet, Abby has started giving me driving “advice”. Do you know what’s worse than a 63 year old backseat driver that you can’t yell at because she’s your mother? I’ll tell you, it’s a 5 year old backseat driver that you can’t yell at because she’s your daughter.
It started with questions about why you do certain things while driving. “Why are we slowing down?” “Why are we stopping?” “Why did you call that man stupid? We don’t say that word.” Ahem.
And then it progressed to directives. “You should watch what you’re doing instead of talking to Grayson.” “You should slow down because you are going to miss our turn.” “Don’t forget our driveway is right up here.”
Now I’m just saying, if you might be someone who might be prone to bouts of road rage (not that I know anyone like that), that can be just slightly annoying. So, I had to sit down with Abby and nicely explain that until she had a driver’s license or had at least been behind the wheel of a vehicle, she wasn’t allowed to give me driving advice. Or until she has been through driver’s ed, and I’m pretty sure they don’t teach that in kindergarten.
You know, I’m sure her teenage years are just going to be full of hugs and giggles, since she already knows more than me. I’m going to start praying now…