Thursday, December 16, 2010

Zone Defense

I love how men can turn absolutely anything into a sports analogy. I almost said men from the south, but I think this phenomenon reaches all of the male species. My favorite comes from the doctor who delivered Abby…

He asked me at one appointment late in my pregnancy with her how many children we planned on having. I answered that we thought we would probably have two or three. He said, “Let me give you a little advice. My wife and I have 3 kids. When you have 2 kids, you can go with man-to-man coverage. But when you have that third child, you have to go to zone defense.”

Well, friends, Burge and I are about to have to implement some zone defense.


Lane 3.0 has an estimated arrival date of June 28, 2011! Note that this ultrasound picture was taken at my 8 week appointment and I am 12 weeks now. So, the little guy (or girl) should look less blob-like and more baby-like by now.

We are thrilled! Especially Abby, who of course, wants a girl. Grayson is slightly less enthusiastic, but has nevertheless declared his desire for a boy. At least somebody will be happy. We could really care less as long as he (or she) is healthy!

I’ve felt pretty good so far, except for a little queasiness and a lot of exhaustion. I’ve had no real food aversions or cravings yet, except for red meat. I could eat a hamburger or steak at every meal!

We are praying that the next 28 weeks chug along as well as the last 12, and we can’t wait to find out if it’s a boy or girl!

Monday, November 22, 2010

5 Things I Learned from the AMAs

If you didn’t watch the American Music Awards last night, this post will likely mean nothing to you. If you did watch them and you are somewhere around my age, I think you will be able to relate.

Here are five things I learned while watching the AMAs…

  1. Apparently, it is no longer a necessity to be able to sing your music live. With all the fancy voo-doo technology of today’s recording studios, they can make people sound really good on an album ( I realize the term album is so terribly outdated, but oh well). But then, when it comes time to perform the song live, it sounds not so good absolutely terrible. Several times last night, I asked Burge, “Can they not hear the music?” Randy Jackson would say they were pitchy. I would say they were NOT GOOD.
  2. As someone (Thanks, Amber!) said on Facebook last night, clearly the economy is so bad that the back-up dancers could not afford clothes. All I can say is AMEN to that! There was a lot of skin. A LOT. We didn’t start watching until the second hour because we waited until the kids went to bed. Wise move on our part.
  3. Pat Monahan’s sparkly pants weirded me out. That does not detract from my love of Train, or that I thought their performance was the best of the night. His pants just weirded me out. I tend to believe if you are a grown man and not a disco singer, you should not wear sparkly pants. But that’s just me.
  4. Everything that was old is now new again. I am fairly certain the pants Pink had on during her performance could be classified as MC Hammer pants. And the dancers during Kesha’s performance (by the way, who the heck is Kesha? Honestly, do they just give out record deals to anybody these days??)? They were sporting mullets. Full on business in the front, party in the back. What is the world coming to?
  5. I am TOTALLY out of touch with the current music scene. And you know what? I am okay with that. Absolutely fine with it.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Queen Bees, Game 1

Tonight was the inaugural game for the Queen Bees, Abby’s soccer team. It was the first real soccer game a third of our team has ever played. Ever. Let’s all keep that in mind, okay?


Some people like to judge a win based on who had the most goals. Personally, I think that’s overrated. I think wins should be awarded for teams who play their little 6 year old hearts out. Who leave it all on the field. The teams who never stop smiling, no matter how far behind they are. The ones who get knocked down and pop right back up, and the smile never leaves their faces. The ones who don’t complain, they just keep right on trucking.


The Queen Bees would be winners in that world. They would ALL be winners in that world. Heck, they ARE all winners!


Unfortunately, that’s not the way they judge a win, and the Queen Bees left tonight 0 and 1. I believe the final score was 5-0, but honestly, I quit counting after a while. But those girls never gave up. I am so proud of the way they handled themselves.


And they had a good time. That really is the most important thing. They had fun. Granted, they would have had more fun had they actually scored a goal, but that will come in time. Maybe lots of time. But it’ll come.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Computers and Kids

Last week, I became the proud owner of this beauty…


And I’ve been trying ever since to get everything moved over from the keyless laptop to this one and figuring out how everything works. I have this odd relationship with technology. I’m not all that technologically savvy, even though I do hold a computer science minor that I earned back in 1999. I’m quite sure when I graduated that I thought because I was fluent in the computer languages C+ and assembly, I would be able to handle any computer related issue that came my way. Alas, the computer industry advanced and my knowledge did not. Which leads me to where I am today: not very technologically savvy.

I know just enough about computers that I can usually mess around with things until I get it the way I want it (plus Google is my friend). However, when I get it the way I want it, I usually can’t remember how I got there. Actually, come to think of it, that’s usually my approach to life in general. I just mess around with stuff until I get it like I like it, and then later I can’t remember what I did to get it there. Yes, frustration is my middle name most of the time. That’s just how I roll.

In other news…


That child there on the right? He is full-on in a size 3T now. Like so full-on in a 3T that if he grows any this winter, he’ll be in a 4T. That makes me kind of sad. He will be three next month. That makes me kind of sad too. Motherhood is such a bittersweet thing…

And finally, a bit of housekeeping… you can now find this little gem of nonsense at So, if you have this page bookmarked, you might want to update the address. Please. If you subscribe in a reader, I don’t think you need to do anything. But what do I know? You might want to re-read those first couple of paragraphs…

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

1st Grade Spelling Wonder

One of the good things about my kids getting older is watching them learn new things. I have been astonished at how much Abby has learned in just the first 3 weeks of first grade. I also love to see her trying to do things on her own. For instance, she brought home this paper the second week of school. Clearly, her teacher let her do it own her own…


Rest assured, when I find that elusive “golbfish”, it will indeed be hers.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The Post with No Title

It has been a wild week in our house. After Grayson’s bout with the croup, he spent 4 days on Prednisone . If you’ve never experienced a 2 year old under the influence of a steroid, then you’ve just not lived. Sleep was hard to come by, and hyperness was at an all time high. We’ve just now started to calm down. Because of this, I can’t manage much coherence right now (let’s just pretend that I can normally put together coherent thoughts, okay?), so here’s a bunch of randomness that has no title.

Lately, everything Grayson eats is “deeee-yish-us”, said while rubbing his tummy and doing his Stevie Wonder head swing. He doesn’t realize yet that he wraps me around his little finger every time he tells me something I cook for him is “deeee-yish-us”.

He has also been obsessed with smells lately. He crinkles his little nose, and says “I smell.” Now, let’s be honest, in a house of four people, two of which are male, there’s not usually a lack of smells. When we ask him, though, what he smells, he always answers “carrots”. Hmmmm, what? Where did that come from? I very rarely cook carrots unless I’m cooking a roast, so who knows what is going through his mind…

Today, I heard him on the monitor waking up from his nap, and since it was almost time to pick Abby up from school, I opened his door to tell him he could get up. When he heard the door open, he sat up in bed and said, “I trying to sweep!” I snickered and asked him to repeat himself, and he said, “I trying to nap, you know, sweep!” Never mess with a boy and his beauty “sweep”.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Monday, Monday

I felt like I was gone all weekend long, so I had a ton of stuff that I needed to get done today. And, how much of that did I actually do? Not much. I was lacking in the motivation department today. At least on the housekeeping side of things. I got up itching to get out the sewing machine. I had been wanting to try to make Grayson a train t-shirt to wear for his Thomas birthday party. In October. I thought I had better get a head start since I had no idea many tries it would take to get it like I wanted it. And of course, I couldn’t make Grayson something without making Abby something too.

Here’s how they turned out… Grayson’s…

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And, Abby’s, quite obviously…

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This little project set me back a whopping $2.00. I found the shirts at the Dollar Tree (what are the chances?!), I cut the appliqu├ęs out of some scrap material, and I had the web fusion stuff left over from another little project. And it only took me a couple of hours! That is huge for me, because I am not a very proficient seamstress. At all.

The best thing about it, though, was this reaction…

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Priceless! I may just have to go ahead and let him wear this one now and make him another one for his birthday party. Who could say no to that face?

Friday, August 20, 2010

Late Night Musings…

Grayson woke up last night about 10:00 with croup. Poor little guy was barking like a seal, struggling to get a good breath and couldn’t talk. Fortunately, we have an awesome family doctor who found us a 24 hour pharmacy and called him in a prescription. While Burge headed out to get his medicine, Grayson and I sat out on the porch in the 700% humidity. I am ever so thankful for the “so thick you could cut it with a knife” humid air because it gave him almost instant relief.

While sitting out there, we watched the random cars go by. I asked Grayson where he thought the cars were going. After a few moments of deliberation, he decided Wal-Mart was their destination. After a few more moments of deep thought, he said, “And they’ll have to ride in the buggy.” At least he knows the rules…

A few minutes later, I told him I was sorry that he felt bad. He told me, “I not feel bad, Mommy. I happy!” Bless his heart…you just can’t keep a good kid down.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Smart Cars…Are They Really So Smart?

Last Friday, after Grayson and I got groceries (Hallelujah for being back to grocery shopping with just one child!) we were in need of some nourishment and the only thing that would fit the bill was some Christian chicken. So we headed over to Chick-Fil-A and on our way through town saw one of these…

I pointed it out to Grayson…”Oh look at the cute little car!”… because I had never seen one on the road anywhere around our area. And then on the way home, guess what we saw.

Yes! Another one! And yes, I am quite sure it was not the same one. They were different colors.

Y’all. I cannot get over how tiny these things are. You would have to really like someone to want to ride in the passenger seat when they were driving one of these. You know how you make fun of couples when you see them riding in a truck with a bench seat and the girl is all slid over up against the guy? Wait. Is that just my family? Is my dad the only one that would always ask how many people it took to drive that thing? If so, this example might not mean much to you. But for the rest of you, this car is so small, you don’t even have to slide on over. Once you get in and shut the door, you are already all slid over. I’m talking zero personal space (and we all know how much I cherish my personal space).

There’s pretty much no space period. How could you get groceries in one of these things? Where would you put your dry cleaning after you pick it up? Hang it from the antenna?

Now, I know that they are better for the environment and very fuel efficient, which I can totally get behind. Especially the fuel efficient part, because I am all for anything that will save money on gas (Hello?! Do we not own a Focus?). After all, saving money is my love language. But even I will not trade saving a buck for safety (most of the time). And how safe can a car really be when it’s so small a VW Beetle could back over it and mistake it for a small dog?

And, on top of that, they are not even all that cheap! You could totally buy… oh I don’t know…a Focus for cheaper than one of these. And you could fit your groceries in a Focus. And your dry cleaning. At the same time. And savor some personal space (not a lot, mind you, but some). But then, I guess a Focus wouldn’t get you noticed quite as much as one of these little guys. I’ve certainly never said, “Hey, Grayson, check out that Focus!” So I guess it’s all about your priorities. Some people like to be noticed, and some people just like to have a place to hang their dry cleaning inside their car.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Weekend in Review

Saturday morning, Burge ran in his first 5K race. Right here would be a good place to insert some pictures of this monumental occasion, but that would mean that I actually had pictures. And to take pictures, I would have actually had to have been there. But, alas, I was not there. Because I am just that good of a wife. Instead, I was snoozing the morning away in my bed, trying to sleep off the effects of having to get up at 5:30 every morning last week.

Anyway I woke up to this.

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Yep, my “9” key bit the dust. I never realized how much I use that #9, or more importantly, the “(“. That left parenthesis is key (no pun intended)... without it, the right parenthesis is just left hanging. And in case you haven’t noticed, I like my parentheses. A lot. They are second only to my beloved comma.

I’m thinking the good ol’ Dell Inspiron is approaching the twilight of his life. He is, after all, over 5 years old. That is practically ancient in computer years. He’s slowed down a lot lately, not all his ports work anymore, and his frame is cracked. I thought a new battery and power cord might revive him a few months ago, but I think it’s just prolonging the inevitable. He’s headed for the laptop graveyard. It brings a tear to my eye because we’ve been through so much together. I’m going to hate to see him go.

Moving on to happier topics… I decided after securing the “Wife of the Year” award Saturday morning by sleeping through Burge’s race, I would keep that ball rolling by not accomplishing anything all day Saturday. I almost achieved that goal too, but this was calling my name…

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The call was just too strong, so I got dressed and made a Sonic happy hour run. Seriously, who can turn down a Route 44 Vanilla Diet Coke for $1? Not I!

We finished off Saturday night with some grilled steaks (by Burge, I was pretty much worthless all day), twice-baked potatoes and a movie. We watched Extraordinary Measures, which was a heart-wrencher, but very good.

All in all, it was an awesome, relaxing Saturday, which will hopefully be good preparation for the packed-to-the-gills week we have ahead of us. Guess what starts this week… SOCCER!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

It’s All Right ‘Cause I’m Saved by the Bell

Thus far in my parenting career, I have remained unscathed when it comes to kids and pop culture. Abby doesn’t have the foggiest idea who Justin Bieber is. She has no desire to “Party in the USA”. She’s still perfectly content watching Nick Jr. and Playhouse Disney, with a side of Phineas and Ferb thrown in. Spongebob is not even allowed in our house.

And frankly, I like it that way. She’s only six, for heaven’s sake. I feel like I should have a few more years before she’s obsessed with that other side of Disney, you know The Suite Life of Waverly Place, iCarly Montana, etc. To be honest, I’m not sure how fond I am of those shows. Why do Zach and Cody live in a suite? Do they have parents? Are the Waverly Place wizards good wizards or bad wizards? Is there such a thing as good wizards? And don’t get me started on Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus… All these shows may very well be harmless, but in order for me to be absolutely sure of this, I would have to watch them and I am not ready to take that step yet. Or maybe ever. Not that I would have to look far for an opportunity. These shows are on. All. The. Time.

I may just have to invest in DVDs of all the seasons of Saved by the Bell. Now there’s some quality tween programming.

Who didn’t love the antics of Zach, Slater, Kelly, Lisa, Jesse and Screech? And who could forget the coolness that was Zach Morris’s humongous cell phone?

There was no questionable content in Saved by the Bell, unless you count that episode where Jesse got hyped up on the speed the night before her big test. Alas, she saw the error in her ways before the thirty minutes were up, so that negates any questionable content. At least in my mind.

Then there was the young, innocent love between Zach and Kelly Kapowski, that culminated in…

A Vegas wedding! It just doesn’t get any more home-spun than that, right? I think it would be awesome to be able to share that nugget of my adolescence with Abby one day. As long as she doesn’t ask me what the gang from Bayside High has been up to since they graduated. I certainly have no plans to explain how Screech has been earning a living these days…

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Grayson Lane, Age 2

Since Abby got a post named after her yesterday, I thought it was only fair Grayson get one today. Grayson is night to Abby’s day, black to her white. They are very different in most areas. Is it because he’s a boy and she’s a girl? Or because she’s first born and he came second? I’m sure those factors play some role in it, but I think it’s mainly because they just have totally different personalities. Not that one is any better. They are both really sweet, good kids (most of the time. I say that after they’ve both been sent to their rooms this afternoon for 2 separate incidents). Just different.

It would never occur to Abby to take a crayon and color the wall, because we have not specifically told her she could. It would never occur to Grayson not to take a crayon and color the wall, because we have never specifically told him not to. Pardon me while I go tell Grayson that it is not okay to color on the walls with crayons. Just in case… Okay, that’s taken care of. Carry on. They are just different.

Grayson has changed tremendously over the past six months. His speech has dramatically improved, and I can’t wait for each day to begin, just to hear what will come out of his mouth next. It’s also fascinating to watch him begin to use his imagination more when playing. And of course, it’s great just to watch him be a goofball, which is quite often. That boy is a ham.

I thought you might get a kick out of some of his recent performances as well. First up, his version of “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star”.

Please note the Stevie Wonder head sway. Nice. Next up, Abby and Grayson asking the blessing on our supper.

Yes, there’s the head sway again. And apparently God hears you better if you squinch your eyes really tight and clasp your hands so tight your knuckles turn white. That’s good to know. And finally, Grayson showing off his mad hula hoop skills and how to do a crunch without your shoulders ever leaving the floor. That’s talent, folks.

Do those simple exercises and you, too can have the awesome physique of a two year old.

Oh my, how I love that boy! He never fails to bring a smile to my face.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Abby K. Lane, First Grader

Abby is officially a first grader. Today was the first day of school around here, and given how perky Abby was when she bounded out of bed at 6:10 this morning, I’d guess she was pretty excited about it. She couldn’t wait to put on her new school clothes and carry her new backpack. She was not so excited to have me walk her into school. But I told her to suck it up because I was going in with her. I don’t ask for a lot from her, but that was something I was not going to budge on. A momma has her boundaries, you know. Maybe I should’ve thought that through a little more…

She asked me to take her picture in her snazzy new duds. And I happily obliged.

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Ready to go!

We made the 2 minute drive to the school, navigated through all poorly parked cars, and Grayson and I walked her in to her class. Here’s where things got a little dicey.

Abby’s teacher had coloring sheets for them to work on while all the first day hoopla was going on. Abby sat down at her desk and got out her crayons. Grayson sat down at the desk next to her and reached for her crayons. In his defense, he has spent the last two months basically doing everything Abby did because that’s what she’s told him to do. When I told him that we weren’t staying and he would have to color when we got home, the tears started flowing. And then the wailing and gnashing of teeth followed. Honestly, you would have thought someone had cut off his arm. Or taken away his best friend, which I guess is probably how he looked at it.

The other parents started looking at us, and not in that sympathetic, “bless his heart” kind of way, but more in that “you’re a bad parent, can’t you control your child” kind of way, I broke out in a sweat and Abby gave me a look that clearly conveyed her embarrassment of the situation. So we high-tailed it out of there and to the car as quickly as possible. On the plus side, with all that commotion, I didn’t have a chance to get teary-eyed that my baby was starting the first grade. On the downside, when we got in the car, I got teary-eyed because I felt sure we had ruined her first day of first grade and someday she would be discussing this embarrassment with her therapist.

Fortunately, when we picked her up this afternoon, she declared this the greatest day of her life and proceeded to relive the entire day, detail by detail as we went to get our celebratory treat…

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A Sonic happy hour slush. Sonic can cure many hurts. Amen.

Grayson and I both apologized for embarrassing her, and she graciously accepted our apologies. However, she did request that we just drop her off at the door tomorrow.

I think that can be arranged.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

She’s Crafty…

First off, let me say that I am not a creative person. And I’m not saying that so that you all will leave me comments (and by the way, did you know that you could leave comments at the end of this post on the actual blog? Just thought I would point that out, because comments to a blogger? They are like crack to an addict) telling me that I am so creative. I’m really not. I have grown in craftiness in the past few years, but not so much in creativity. The difference is the ideas. I’m great at doing the craft, not great at coming up with the idea for the craft.

Enter the internet. Hallelujah for the world wide web! It is chock full of really creative people who like to share their knowledge. It is a virtual smorgasbord of creativity. There is a plethora of ideas out there waiting to be discovered. And while I may not be very good at coming up with my own creative ideas, I am awesome at copying someone else’s. I almost said stealing right there, but I’m not really stealing because these people gladly share their talent, even going so far as to give step-by-step instructions. Gotta love that generosity.

One of my favorite crafty people is Jill at Controlling My Chaos. She is incredibly creative and pretty funny too! I’ve gotten lots of ideas from her blog, especially for teachers’ gifts and school stuff. Which leads me to my latest project: ID tags for Abby’s backpack and lunch box. These are super cute, if I did make them myself.

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And here’s a close-up…

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All this took was about fifteen minutes, a couple of badge holders and key rings (found at good ol’ Wal-Mart), scrapbook paper, ribbon and a picture.

This was a really quick and cheap project, and Abby loves them!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Girls’ Day Out

Saturday, Abby and I had our 2nd Annual Girls’ Day Out Before School Starts. That’s the official name. We’re going to have t-shirts made.

Abby loves to go to the movies. But, let’s be honest, there’s not a lot of movies out there that I’m really comfortable taking my very sheltered 6 year old to. Even a lot of the animated, “for kids” movies have a lot of innuendo and questionable scenes in them.

However, I had heard rave reviews about Ramona and Beezus. I adored all the Beverly Cleary books growing up, and I had introduced Abby to them this past year. So we decided to go see the movie Saturday afternoon. To say I was as excited about seeing it as Abby was would be an understatement. I was probably more excited about the movie. Abby was definitely more excited about the popcorn. That girl can put away some popcorn.

After shelling out $97 for 2 matinee tickets, a popcorn and a drink, we grabbed Abby a booster seat and headed into the theater. Abby is plenty tall enough to see without a booster seat, but she can’t keep the seat from folding up with her in it. And you have not seen panic until you’ve seen a little girl, who loves her some popcorn, get folded up in a theater seat and almost drop her $60 bag of popcorn. Nor have you seen the panic when a momma has to decide what to save first: the $60 popcorn or her daughter. I’ll let you guess what I decided.

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Here’s Abby enjoying the golden popcorn. Seriously, how big does she look in this picture? When did she grow up? I swear she was Grayson’s age just yesterday. And why does she look mildly frightened here?

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The Lane girls… Am I a wee bit of a photo hog? Possibly.

The movie? It did not disappoint. Honestly, it is a great family movie. There was not one inappropriate thing in it. Not one time did I hold my breath, hoping Abby wouldn’t ask me what something meant.

One thing that did bother me… Bridget Moynahan played the Quimby momma. You know who she is, Tom Brady’s ex-girlfriend, mother of his first-born son. You know, she's like my age. And she’s playing the mother of Beezus, a fifteen year old. Like I could play the mother of a 15 year old. Yeah, that made me feel old. Until I came home and googled her. And I found out from Wikipedia that she’s actually Burge’s age. And since we all know that Burge robbed the cradle when he married me, I felt much better about that whole situation.

We continued the 2nd Annual Girls’ Day Out Before School Starts with a little shopping, during which Abby declared that the only thing she has ever really wanted in life is a pair of high heels. That wish, unfortunately for her, remains un-fulfilled. And we ended the day with a Coke Icee.

It was an awesome day, and I’m so glad we got to spend it together!

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Oh, the Things Kids Say…

The other day, Grayson and I went out to the school to see what first grade class Abby was going to be in. There was another woman there checking out the class lists too. She had somewhat of an odor surrounding her, like perhaps it had been a while since her last shower. Grayson said, quite loudly, “Momma, what’s that smell?” I tried to shush him, but since he did not get the answer he was looking for the first time he kept asking over and over and got louder and louder. Thank goodness, I’m still the only one that can understand half of what Grayson says…


After her first night of soccer camp ever…

Abby declared: “I know everything there is to know about soccer!”

My response: “Really?”

Abby: “Well, everything they taught us tonight”

Obviously, she needs no lessons in confidence.


While riding in the car, Grayson attempted a knock-knock joke…

Grayson: “Knock-knock, Momma”

Me: “Who’s there?”

Grayson: “Orange”

Me: “Orange who?”

Grayson: “Knock-knock” -- Okay, this is not going well...

Me: “Who’s there?”

Grayson: “Banana”

Me: “Banana who?”

Grayson: “I thirsty, Momma”

All-righty then.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

A Boy and His Action Figures (don’t call them dolls)

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I love that Grayson asks me to tuck in Buzz and Woody every night.

I love that he has to situate them “just so” every night.

I love that he explains to me that Woody doesn’t sleep with his hat on.

I love that he tries to take off their shoes because they shouldn’t be in the bed with their shoes on.

I love that he asks to pray for Nana, Pop, Grandmother and the playroom every night.

I love that he asks me to “cover you up” at least 5 times every night before it’s just right and I can turn out the light.

I love that I have a picture to remind me of these nights since there will come a time when he no longer needs me to tuck him in or wants me to kiss him good night 15 times before I leave the room.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

You Can’t Judge a Book by Its Cover…or the Contents by the Box

Last week, our UPS man brought me these boxes…

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And in those two boxes were these…

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Waste much?

And for the person who will inevitably ask why anyone would order just 2 pens, let me explain. A few weeks ago, I won this awesome giveaway over at Alabama Bloggers for a $60 gift certificate to CSN Stores. If you’ve never checked them out, you should. Just about anything you can think of that you want to buy online, they have. And lots of free super fast shipping. I decided to use my gift certificate to buy Grayson’s birthday present…this Little Tikes basketball goal.


However, it was only $28, and I had to use the whole $60 at once. So, being that I do heart my label maker, labels were an obvious choice. But I still had a few dollars left, hence the two pens. My frugal self is happy to say I paid $1.16 out of pocket for the basketball goal, labels and pens. Because of that, I am more than willing to overlook the massive boxes and itty-bitty contents.

And by the way, while I did get the gift certificate for free through Alabama Bloggers, CSN has no idea who I am and did not ask me to tell you about their store and really big boxes. I did that all on my own.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Weekend in Review

Well, I am officially a soccer mom. Abby started her soccer season this past week with a mini-soccer camp. And Burge began his career as a soccer coach. It’s a new era in the Lane house!

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Here’s my sassy girl, ready for her first night of soccer.

While Burge and Abby learned the ins and outs of the game of soccer, I was planning our new MOPS year with my fellow MOPS moms. There was a little eating, a little more talking and a lot of planning that went on. I think it’s going to be a good year!

Saturday was mine and Burge’s 11th wedding anniversary. So, we did what any couple that’s been married 11 years and have two kids would do, we took the kids with us and went to eat at Wingstop. Then we followed it up with Dairy Queen. I honestly could not have asked for anything better.

Before we took off Saturday afternoon for the big city of Fort Payne, we made a quick stop by the Peddler’s Market, a local antique store. I knew the time was coming that Abby would need a desk in her room to do homework and whatever else it is that 6 year old girls do. I also knew from looking at prices on the internet that I would not be purchasing a new desk. I cannot believe the prices of furniture today. Furniture that is not even real wood! So anyway, Burge and I had discussed it and decided we would keep an eye on Craiglist and check out yard sales for a real wood desk that we could refurbish, if needed. Then last week, I saw a picture of a desk on Facebook at the Peddler’s Market that fit the bill perfectly. So Saturday, after a bit of inspecting and negotiating, this little beauty came home with us…

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A diamond in the rough, she is… While I certainly have nothing against avocado green, this will be stripped and painted white to match the rest of Abby’s furniture. You know, once the temperature dips below 90 degrees. 100+ degree weather is not really conducive to painting. At least, not in my world.

Sunday, we had nursery duty in Grayson’s class. In case you were wondering, spending an hour in a small, confined space with ten 2 & 3 year olds will make you question your sanity. So, we came home, took a few Valium and now we’re ready to start a new week!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Dream a Little Dream

Earlier this week a Facebook status sparked an on-line discussion about recurring dreams. There’s a couple that I have just about every other week, and they both have to do with school. I’m quite sure that there’s some deep-seated meaning to these, I just don’t know what it is.

In the first one, I’m in high school, and I can’t remember the combination to my locker. So since I can’t get into my locker to get my books out, I’m late for class. Let me set this up properly. Back when I was in high school (way, way back then, before everyone had cell phones and laptops and when acid-washed, tight-rolled jeans were cool), we had two types of lockers: big lockers and little lockers. A big one would be prime real estate, like the penthouse apartment of lockers, while the little one would be like a studio apartment in the ‘hood. A big locker was tall, had hooks to hang your coat, backpack & purse (what exactly did I have to carry around that I needed a purse for at 14 years old? Another of life’s mysteries…) and a shelf for your books. A little locker might have room for your books. Maybe. But certainly not room for a Trapper Keeper. You could just forget that. Anyway, in my dream, I have a little locker that is on the very top. So, on top of not being able to remember the combination to get it open, I can barely even reach the locker. I am not lying when I say that I have broken out into a sweat while I’m typing this. That’s how disturbing this dream is for me.

The second one involves college. It’s finals week and I discover that I have a final for a class that I have never been to and didn’t know I was enrolled in. I don’t have the book for the class, so I can’t study, even if I had any clue what the class was about. A variation on this dream is that I know I’m enrolled in the class, but we’ve still never had class or a test, and the final will count as the entire grade for the class.

Unresolved issues regarding educational institutions, you think?

Now, keep in mind I have been out of high school for 15 years and college for over 10. Should I not have gotten past this stuff by now? Will I be 80 and still dealing with not being able to get my locker open? Oh the horrors!

So, what say you? Any recurring dreams? Discuss among yourselves…

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Sign of the Times

I did not play video games when I was two. I’m fairly certain I did not know what a video game was when I was two. Had video games even been invented when I was two? The times, they are a-changin’… Or more like, they’ve already changed.

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Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Because I Like a List

A few thoughts on the Bachelorette in list format, because who doesn’t like a list…

  1. This has been the best Bachelorette ever in my humble opinion. So. Much. Drama. Chris Harrison ain’t lying when he says its the most dramatic rose ceremony ever.
  2. Could someone please school contestants on proper pronoun usage? For the past few years, I have heard “her and I” and “him and I” more than I can count. It’s “she and I”, people! For the love of all that’s good, it’s “SHE AND I”! Alabama even wrote a song about it!
  3. Why does a messy break-up make such riveting television? First, Jake and Vienna and now, Frank and Ali. It’s like a train wreck. No, scratch that. It IS a train wreck.
  4. Speaking of Frank (and I’m sure there are plenty of people speaking of Frank today), at what point exactly did he realize he was in love with Nicole? One of the numerous times he was making out with Ali? I realize there was probably a lot of editing done, but still…he had to wait until the final three? Really?
  5. Does anyone think if Chris L. doesn’t walk away with the final rose he’s going to have to enter the witness protection program to get away from the hoards of single women who will be after him?
  6. Ali’s hair has bothered me all season. There has been some abuse with the use of bobby pins. Yep, I’m calling excessive bobby pin use!
  7. I thought it would have been perfect when Ali was crying over Frank if Kasey had made a guest appearance and sang an off-key, two-note song about how he would guard and protect her heart. That would’ve made her feel better, don’t you think? Then they could have gone and gotten tattoos together. Perfection.
  8. I think Roberto has a perspiration issue. He was sweating in every scene last night. And not just a little, it was rolling off his face like Niagara Falls. Yes, I know they were in Tahiti, but I didn’t notice Chris sweating buckets.
  9. I’m thinking “The Men Tell All” and the finale will be somewhat of a letdown after all the drama this season, but the “After the Final Rose” oughta be a doozy.
  10. I should be so ashamed that I analyze a reality TV dating show like I do, but alas, I am not.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Weekend in Review

We had a pretty laid back weekend compared to what we’ve had the past few weeks. Saturday was errand day. Burge had to go line the soccer field (that’s a whole ‘nother post about how he went from assistant coach to head soccer coach in one fell swoop), so the kids went to Centre with me. It could have been a recipe for disaster. However, it went remarkably well. Only one meltdown in one store. And I do apologize to the gentleman who had to watch me “discipline” my child in the middle of CVS. I honestly would have taken him outside to administer said discipline, but since the bone of contention was his disdain for riding in the buggy, I felt like taking him out of the buggy would have almost been a win for him and well, I just couldn’t let that happen.

Anyway, we went to Wal-Mart after CVS, and apparently the discipline worked because Grayson had no issues with the buggy there. We picked up Abby’s school supply list and filled most of it on the spot. Two small tangents here. First, kudos once again to the marketing people of Wal-Mart. How clever is it to have all the supply lists for all the schools mere feet away from the 50 cent packs of #2 pencils and 25 cent glue sticks? Sheer genius. Also, here’s a shout-out of thanks to the 1st grade teachers at Abby’s school for the short school supply list. I think it’s pretty smart that you load up the kindergarteners with the 2 page lists because they don’t know any better, so then when they hit first grade and the list is about 1/3 of the kindergarten list, they feel immense thanks. And relief. So, we filled most of her list while we were at Wal-Mart. However, there’s always that one elusive item on the list that is unattainable. I thought it was going to be the First Grade Creative Writing Journal. The list was awfully specific and even gave stores where it was carried. That, in my vast 2 years of school supply buying experience is the kiss of death. But no, instead it was the 32 pack of crayons. Does such a thing exist? I found 8 packs, 24 packs and 48 packs, but no 32 packs. We went with the 48 pack and called it a day.

Sunday, we went to church, and then I headed to K-Mart to peruse the clearance toys which are an extra 50% off this week. I hit this sale last year and managed to buy most of the kids’ Christmas and birthday presents in July. This year I not only managed to fill our Christmas and birthday lists for the kids (for the most part…Santa still has to do his thing), but also the lists of most of my family members. It was a well spent afternoon, to say the least. Plus, they gave me a free diet coke. I don’t know what was up with that, but I never look a gift diet coke in the mouth.

And so, another weekend is in the books and another week begins. The summer is winding down…

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Friday Fun

Chalk another one up for the “Lane Family Summer of FUN”! Mark another one off the list! Friday, Burge took off work and we took the kids to Huntsville to the U.S. Space and Rocket Center.

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I’m ashamed to say I have been a resident of Alabama all 33 years of my life and I have never been there. No, we never took a field trip there. Apparently, our class was super bad, because I don’t recall getting to take the really cool field trips. Or maybe my definition of cool field trips has changed over the years.

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Anyway, it was my first visit. And no, we didn’t see the Star Wars exhibit. We could get in free to the museum with our Gadsden Center for Cultural Arts membership. We’re cheap. ‘Nuff said.

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We did get lost inside the center trying to find the museum. There were a bunch of buildings! And the map was difficult to understand! Granted, any map is hard for me to understand. If Burge and I are ever on the Amazing Race, I would have to be the driver and he would have to be the map reader, because I can’t read a map to save my life. But then I would have to learn to drive a stick shift too because there’s always one leg of the race where they have to drive a stick. But that’s neither here nor there…

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We did eventually find the museum. Look how tiny Abby looks in the space shuttle seat!

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Grayson, of course, associated everything about space with Buzz Lightyear. We heard, “To infinity, and beyond!” more than once. Yes, he is getting out of one of those supermarket rides. And yes, that was one of his favorite things. We could’ve saved ourselves a trip to Huntsville and just carried him to the Piggly Wiggly.

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Here is Burge and the kids standing under something really big. I could make up a name of what it is to make it sound like I know what I’m talking about, but we’ll just leave it at “something really big”.

After we left the Space and Rocket Center, we surprised the kids with lunch at Chuck E. Cheese. Two trips to the Cheese in a week! Can you handle the fun?? We have totally made up the points we lost with the absentee ducks and lack of cow milking. We are riding high on the Chuck E. Cheese wave right now!

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(Please note how Abby is clutching her “prizes” that she bought with her tickets at Chuck E. Cheese. A plastic top and lip gloss…that only cost $15. A piece.) We achieved good naps! Success!

Friday, July 16, 2010

My Favorite Thing About Summer

There are many things I love about summer… sleeping late, longer days with more daylight, swimming, all the fresh fruit, watching the kids play outside. But there is one thing that I love more than any other. It is my absolute favorite thing about summer. Here it is…

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FRESH FRIED OKRA! I could eat my weight in it! As a matter of fact, I think I ate about half this plate for supper last night. It was so good! And we grew it ourselves (I use the term “we” very loosely, but I did cook it)!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

An Afternoon of Non-Fun

Have you ever heard the expression, “That was about as much fun as a root canal”? Well, I am going to shatter that myth today. I can almost guarantee that whatever they are comparing to a root canal is most certainly more fun than a root canal. On a scale of 1 to 10 in fun-ness, a root canal falls somewhere around a –347. If you were to make a list of all things in order of fun, it would be right above running over your own dog. In other words, it’s not fun. At all.

Ask me how I know. You remember that toothache that had been bothering me? That led to a trip to the dentist on Monday, which led to a root canal yesterday, which will lead to yet another trip to the dentist in a few weeks for a crown. See? The lack of fun just never stops! And guess what else? I got to PAY for all this non-fun! As a matter of fact, I’m betting I’ll be paying for this un-fun for several months. It’s truly the gift that keeps on giving.

I was pretty anxious about the whole procedure. I don’t really have a fear of the dentist, but I don’t particularly enjoy having other people’s hands in my mouth (there’s some more non-fun!). So, I was a little nervous going in. Then, as I was filling out my paperwork, I noticed they had the radio tuned to a Christian talk radio station. I am in no way, shape or form dogging Christian talk radio. But, talk radio in general is pretty much never my choice of entertainment (more non-fun! You get to listen to someone talk while other people have their hands in your mouth!). This particular talk radio program was featuring a man talking about when things don’t go as planned. I can certainly relate to that, after all, there I sit about to have a root canal. Not part of my plan. But then, he mentions how his wife has had 2 oral procedures done in the last 2 months and neither of them worked. What?? Did I really need to hear that? I’m already anxious, sitting here about to have an oral procedure done, and you’re telling me that it’s possible that it could not work? I could have it twice and it still not work? Oh, the irony.

After 4 shots to deaden my mouth to work on one tooth (which, by the way, I greatly appreciated. By all means, make sure that I can’t feel whatever you are doing with all those instruments you are being sure to keep out of my line of sight.), they started the procedure. A few minutes in, the hygienist tells me that if I need her to suction my mouth to raise my hand. Then the dentist chimes in, “Don’t wait until you’re about to drown.” This was humorous because they had just given me 4 shots in the mouth! You could have been stabbing me with an ice pick and I wouldn’t have known it. How exactly was I supposed to know if I was overflowing with drool?

Anyway, the whole thing took about 45 minutes, and I left the office with a lighter wallet and a completely numb right side of my face. So what did I do next? Well, I was in Gadsden, so of course I went to Aldi. Honestly, I figured that a little facial paralysis wouldn’t make me stand out too much from the normal crowd at Aldi. Heck, I could have drool running down the side of my face and I wouldn’t draw much extra attention there. At least I got to go without any kids.

Basically I could’ve summed up this long, rambling tale with one short equation… Root canal = No fun. So there you go.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Where a Kid Can Be a Kid and Not Break Anything

Yesterday, the kids and I made the long trip to Birmingham to visit with my aunt. It had been a long time since I had been to her house, and the kids had never been. It has also been a long time since my aunt has had little kids in her house. Or I should say, little kids like mine. She has her granddaughter there all the time. But one 2 year old little girl is no match for a 2 year old rambunctious Grayson and a not-so-graceful 6 year old Abby. She has a lot of breakable things. A lot. And they are all significant in some way, like her great-great-great-great grandmother brought them over on the Mayflower or something.

I am happy to report that, to my knowledge, nothing was broken while we were there. I am quite sure that she will be finding things in odd places for many days to come, but they should all be in one piece.July2010 041

Abby read to cousin Callie.

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Grayson rode Callie’s rocking horse dangerously close to the before mentioned breakables.

And then I tried to get a picture of all three cousins together. You can imagine how well that went.

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Attempt #1…Gray is the only one looking at the camera…

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Attempt #2…Grayson is still smiling, but no longer looking at the camera. Abby is looking at the camera but has her hand in her mouth, and Callie is looking at her feet. Let’s try this one more time…

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Attempt #3… Third time is definitely not a charm. Oh well, sometimes you just have to take what you can get.

After all the fun with the breakables and picture taking, it was time to eat lunch. We took the kids to eat where a kid can be a kid. Yes, we braved the Chuck E. Cheese. With 3 kids and only 2 adults. Zone defense, baby.

Neither of my kids had ever been to the Cheese, so they really had no idea what to expect. To say they were immediately taken in and slightly overwhelmed would be an understatement.

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This was Grayson’s expression the entire time we ate our pizza. I’m not sure he blinked at all. There was just too much to take in.

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This is Abby sulking because she couldn’t go play before we ate. I’m such a mean momma.

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Grayson made a new friend. This is where most of his tokens went. He liked riding the train with Barney. I also discovered that he has a talent for knocking down rubber ducks with a mechanical arm. I’m not really sure how that will translate into real life, but I’m working on it.

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Abby spread her tokens around pretty evenly. She really liked this Kentucky Derby game, and girlfriend can rock it on Whack-A-Mole. She’s got mad skills.

We had a really awesome time visiting with family, and Chuck E. Cheese wore the kids out so much that they slept the entire way home. That is really my one goal for the summer: wear them out so they will take a nap every single day. So far, so good.